This has nothing to with Japan. I was thinking about my dear friend Des and recalled a certain novella, shall we say, that he had begun and chose to share with me. Having seemed slightly dismayed when he realised my sidekick and boyfriend, Fran, hadn’t read it, I thought maybe I should share it with all who dare wander onto this drivel-ridden webspace.

From Derby with Love

Lucy reclined on a chair in the sumptuous penthouse suite of the Romada Travel Inn Wolverhampton. She glanced over at the bed where her lover/techno boffin, Francis Boot lay comatose after a night of online blackjack and vodka martinis; sans the martini. A small noise in the room caught her attention and she smiled grimly as she eased her Walther PPK from its holster and waited with the patience of a natural born hunter. A shadowy figure slinked through the curtains from the balcony and positioned itself over the four poster bed.
Lucy flipped the light switch “Hold it, dirt bag” she intoned in a voice resonating with the clamour of Northern industry. The figure froze in position, a knife still clutched in its hand, and turned to face its gin-soaked captor.
“What are you doing here?” barked Lucy as she sipped from her pint of Bovril and stared coolly down the barrel of her pistol.
“We want the blueprints for the device, O’Melia, and we won’t stop until we have them” the would be assassin hissed in a querulous voice.
“What blueprints?” asked Lucy, pokerfaced.
“Damn your hide” yelled the black clad killer as he lunged at Lucy.
Three whispered responses emanated from the silenced barrel of Lucy’s handgun.
“You bloody Northern monkey” croaked the hit man as he tumbled to the floor.
“See you in Hull” spat Lucy in a voice that made a shower in liquid oxygen seem like a sauna in the Bahamas by comparison.
Lucy stood up and downed the rest of her Bovril. So the South had upped the ante had they, well they wouldn’t find one Lucy “Iron Balls” O’Melia wanting. And what was this mysterious device? Lucy decided it was time to rouse Fran she had to move, and move fast.

Tune in next week for the next thrilling instalment of
FROM DERBY WITH LOVE

This entry was posted on Tuesday, March 25th, 2008 at 5:53 am and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.